Maybe I’m contradicting everything I’m supposed to believe in for a spot in paradise?” One user confessed to never having had gay friends because, they now realize, society has trained them to avoid gay people. Some selections: “From my time as a Bible salesperson, the indoctrinated only hear themselves and who they are afraid to displease,” “We are all kids of God and we all try the best in our life,” “I found myself manipulating my ideologies and morals to fit His needs in the hopes for acceptance. “Do the insane hear the voice distorted? Do the indoctrinated hear another voice entirely?” He’s getting to the heart of the spiritual question left in the wake of an event like Orlando, asking how God, which for so many people stands for love, could be used to justify death.Īmid the white noise of the “where’s your album” reactions to the note on Tumblr-Ocean has yet to release a follow-up to Channel Orange-are fans answering his final questions about talking to God. It suggests that God is on Ocean’s side, but it wonders whether everyone thinks the same thing about themselves. It draws a line between the murderous homophobia practiced by ISIS and the Orlando gunman the group inspired, the homophobia of conservative Christianity and his own father, and the internal loathing of many queer people who have grown up hearing such messages. This new note also speaks to commonality, but commonality in hatred. All wanting to be seen, touched, heard, paid attention to.” Wherever you are … I’m starting to think we’re a lot alike. It was a culture-shaking event at the time-the world is still lacking for popular, young musicians who are LGBT, especially ones with connections to hip-hop-but Ocean has since maintained some mystery around his personal life, politics, and sexuality, saying only that he identifies with no label. Do the insane hear the voice distorted? Do the indoctrinated hear another voice entirely?Īround the release of his 2012 album Channel Orange, Ocean used Tumblr to post a similarly stream-of-consciousness note where he talked about a romance with a man. I wanna know what others hear, I’m scared to know but I wanna know what everyone hears when they talk to God. If I being myself were more awesome at being detached from my own story in a way I being myself never could be. I left my siblings out of it and spoke with my maker directly and I think he sounds a lot like myself. Reality by comparison looks grey, as in neither black nor white but also bleak. Because who else will in earnest? I daydream on the idea that maybe all this barbarism and all these transgressions against ourselves is an equal and opposite reaction to something better happening in this world, some great swelling wave of openness and wakefulness out here. So we say pride and we express love for who and what we are. Many don’t see anything wrong with passing down the same old values that send thousands of kids into suicidal depression each year. Many are annoyed by our wanting to be married like everyone else or use the correct restroom like everyone else. That was the last afternoon I saw my father and the first time I heard that word, I think, although it wouldn’t shock me if it wasn’t. I was six years old when I heard my dad call our transgender waitress a faggot as he dragged me out a neighborhood diner saying we wouldn’t be served because she was dirty. I heard the gunman feigned dead among all the people he killed. I heard on the news that the aftermath of a hate crime left piles of bodies on a dance floor this month. Words like abomination popped off my skin like hot grease as he went on to describe a lake of fire that God wanted me in. I heard my pastor speak for God too, quoting scripture from his book. I heard the crowds stone these fallen men if they move after they hit the ground. Whenever you need just a little dose of inspiration, look no further than to these beautiful Christian wallpapers.I read in the paper that my brothers are being thrown from rooftops blindfolded with their hands tied behind their backs for violating sharia law.
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